I guess you know when things are genuine when everything begins to seem unreal. The people you know, how you know them, why you know them, how much they have affected your life and how much you truly love them for it. And even the people you don't like, or have had some sort of "negative" input in your life must be thanked. Whatever was done by them seemed pretty bad on a smaller scale, but in the grand scheme of things, if it were not for certain not so great events in one's life, then one would not be who or where they are today. Whether they are in a "good" place or a "bad" place, that all really is subjective. Things are blurring for me a little bit, in a weird way. Not that I am forgetting things, but they are refocusing and I'm looking at a lot of things a different way. Who knows.
Anyway, anyone who actually reads any of this and is waiting for Part III of "Sand and Stars", well, thank you for reading it will arrive sometime before the week's end. Sorry about the delay (I still don't know who I'm apologizing to, but eh...) but it shall be up soon.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Short Straw
Who drew the short straw?
Who's fate lies in wait?
Of the last of all options
which one leads you straight?
Straight to the end of all life and what of
this new path that may lead you
to new light and new love.
Or perhaps what you feel in the pit of your gut
is more than meant for you, but for her.
She is on your mind
but not in your heart
and it is as of yet unknown
whether she can be a part.
One within you
within her
to be us.
When you fade what is left
and turn ash into dust
and turn dust into clay
and then form something new
that's when you put in you.
Take the crude model
and sculpt it as such
sure, it starts off as nothing
and it isn't much
but you form and refine
each shape and each curve
until it looks fit for color
which you then promptly serve.
You pull out your paints
take the blue and the red
paint the skin and the eyes
and the hair on your heads.
Keep painting and painting
until you paint in your sleep
and you're never done painting
and it is never complete.
Because it can't be painted by just one
and one alone
it must be shared by both
it must be shared by both
it must be shared and equal
and it must be a joint effort
cause it cannot be sculpted
by one and no other
hearts that share the same feelings
for one to another.
It must be shared by both
it must be shared by both
because, of course all alone
you can make of it the most
of what you can, but it's better
if she is there too.
On same plane and same level
and
same
mindset
as
you
Who's fate lies in wait?
Of the last of all options
which one leads you straight?
Straight to the end of all life and what of
this new path that may lead you
to new light and new love.
Or perhaps what you feel in the pit of your gut
is more than meant for you, but for her.
She is on your mind
but not in your heart
and it is as of yet unknown
whether she can be a part.
One within you
within her
to be us.
When you fade what is left
and turn ash into dust
and turn dust into clay
and then form something new
that's when you put in you.
Take the crude model
and sculpt it as such
sure, it starts off as nothing
and it isn't much
but you form and refine
each shape and each curve
until it looks fit for color
which you then promptly serve.
You pull out your paints
take the blue and the red
paint the skin and the eyes
and the hair on your heads.
Keep painting and painting
until you paint in your sleep
and you're never done painting
and it is never complete.
Because it can't be painted by just one
and one alone
it must be shared by both
it must be shared by both
it must be shared and equal
and it must be a joint effort
cause it cannot be sculpted
by one and no other
hearts that share the same feelings
for one to another.
It must be shared by both
it must be shared by both
because, of course all alone
you can make of it the most
of what you can, but it's better
if she is there too.
On same plane and same level
and
same
mindset
as
you
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Thanksgiving Day
"It's a sign..."
He exclaimed,
"The good Lord has arrived!"
You pray to something you believe but can't see with your eyes.
Is it that I'm too blind to notice?
Or too stubborn to care?
When it all falls apart,
am I to believe someone's there?
Overlooking my "path" that "He" has set from the start.
Put the blood in my veins that now runs through my heart.
Placed my brain in my head and my feet on the ground.
Makes the images in my sight and in my ears, places sound.
The omnipotent? Almighty? Oh, God...give me a break.
If you're really there, then why do I feel so fake?
Every minute of the day, we play as your pawns.
From sunrise to sunset, from dusk until dawn.
Am I to give thanks, believe, attribute my life
to someone, or something, I can't see with my eyes?
"But see, without eyes...I see without mine,
I see my God right here, even though I am blind."
Maybe it's the concept, with which I disagree
that your God is her God, and he is also with me.
When we all believe something completely unique
We're all too quick to jump up and judge and critique.
And I dislike your religion, and you dislike my beliefs.
Only, I'll let you pray, but you just won't let me be.
So I say we give thanks to our own desires
with no prerequisites or justifications required
I say we give thanks to the sun and the moon
without which we'd have not night nor a noon
I say we give thanks to the sound of the Earth
what she says when we sleep, and how she smiles at our birth
I say we give thanks to one another always
cause we're all self-sustaining in so many ways
And I give thanks to you
no matter who you are.
Because no matter how different our beliefs
or how we live day to day
we are all one in this world
we are all one in the same.
(Happy Thanksgiving to all, even though that may be the most awkward way you've ever received Thanksgiving wishes and by far the most awkward way I have delivered them.)
He exclaimed,
"The good Lord has arrived!"
You pray to something you believe but can't see with your eyes.
Is it that I'm too blind to notice?
Or too stubborn to care?
When it all falls apart,
am I to believe someone's there?
Overlooking my "path" that "He" has set from the start.
Put the blood in my veins that now runs through my heart.
Placed my brain in my head and my feet on the ground.
Makes the images in my sight and in my ears, places sound.
The omnipotent? Almighty? Oh, God...give me a break.
If you're really there, then why do I feel so fake?
Every minute of the day, we play as your pawns.
From sunrise to sunset, from dusk until dawn.
Am I to give thanks, believe, attribute my life
to someone, or something, I can't see with my eyes?
"But see, without eyes...I see without mine,
I see my God right here, even though I am blind."
Maybe it's the concept, with which I disagree
that your God is her God, and he is also with me.
When we all believe something completely unique
We're all too quick to jump up and judge and critique.
And I dislike your religion, and you dislike my beliefs.
Only, I'll let you pray, but you just won't let me be.
So I say we give thanks to our own desires
with no prerequisites or justifications required
I say we give thanks to the sun and the moon
without which we'd have not night nor a noon
I say we give thanks to the sound of the Earth
what she says when we sleep, and how she smiles at our birth
I say we give thanks to one another always
cause we're all self-sustaining in so many ways
And I give thanks to you
no matter who you are.
Because no matter how different our beliefs
or how we live day to day
we are all one in this world
we are all one in the same.
(Happy Thanksgiving to all, even though that may be the most awkward way you've ever received Thanksgiving wishes and by far the most awkward way I have delivered them.)
A Distance
She is so far away.
She is in front of your face.
Her body is right there
but her mind, in another place.
On the outside her smile
feels warm and sincere
and although it may be
on the inside, it's not here.
She is miles away,
away from the place.
Away from her thoughts
and her feelings,
she strays.
You ask of her only gratitude in return
and nothing more, for you know
why she yearns.
The distance is great
and the greater it grows
with each passing hour
and each dying rose
The distance is invisible | elbisivni si ecnatsid ehT
intangible | elbignatni
but there, | ,ereht tub
and there is no way | yaw on si ereht dna
that you can | nac uoy taht
pretend you don't care. | .erac t'nod uoy dneterp
A love,
it seems,
too strong to break.
The perfect hand of cards
you have,
but fold.
You've made yourself the bet,
and now you've sold,
you've sold your love
for a wager
worn thin
in the end,
you knew,
you always knew,
that you would not win.
She will end up with him
It was so tempting...
Why was it so tempting?
How could it be tempting?
What were you attempting
to prove
to yourself?
She is in front of your face.
Her body is right there
but her mind, in another place.
On the outside her smile
feels warm and sincere
and although it may be
on the inside, it's not here.
She is miles away,
away from the place.
Away from her thoughts
and her feelings,
she strays.
You ask of her only gratitude in return
and nothing more, for you know
why she yearns.
The distance is great
and the greater it grows
with each passing hour
and each dying rose
The distance is invisible | elbisivni si ecnatsid ehT
intangible | elbignatni
but there, | ,ereht tub
and there is no way | yaw on si ereht dna
that you can | nac uoy taht
pretend you don't care. | .erac t'nod uoy dneterp
A love,
it seems,
too strong to break.
The perfect hand of cards
you have,
but fold.
You've made yourself the bet,
and now you've sold,
you've sold your love
for a wager
worn thin
in the end,
you knew,
you always knew,
that you would not win.
She will end up with him
It was so tempting...
Why was it so tempting?
How could it be tempting?
What were you attempting
to prove
to yourself?
You didn't think
Of the
Us, but the you, and you
Let it get away from you.
Everything you worked so hard
To preserve, this time, is
Gone now.
Oh, how it hurts, but
Only when you let it,
Forget it.
Let go
Of everything you've ever held
Very close to you because you thought it would
Eventually turn out okay and in the end
I could be wrong.
But it's
on time,
we depend.
Of the
Us, but the you, and you
Let it get away from you.
Everything you worked so hard
To preserve, this time, is
Gone now.
Oh, how it hurts, but
Only when you let it,
Forget it.
Let go
Of everything you've ever held
Very close to you because you thought it would
Eventually turn out okay and in the end
I could be wrong.
But it's
on time,
we depend.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
What's a life to live
when you've taken away
all the options, now gone,
quiet and frail you lay.
Rest your head on your bed
dig your feet in the sand.
Then stand up and sink in
right where you stand.
Spiraling downwards,
your mind starts to turn.
Your stomach, it squirms.
Single cell resuscitated
while you're still feeling nauseated
Split and split
keep splitting
die.
Live and live
keep living
multiply.
Keep keeping time
just keep right on it.
Fall to your knees while your head spins
and vomit.
And take in her perfume
through your nostrils again
in your mind as you kneel and stomach distends
and compresses
and releases last night's mistake.
You both tried so hard to sleep
but kept each other awake.
And you fumbled around
as you tried to connect
but your love's been outwitted
by mixed drinks and sex
and your clothes are misplaced and lost in the forest
that you find yourself lost inside
and she calls to you
you smell her scent.
She beckons you...
you reply to what's been sent to you.
And you continue to follow her sweet voice
as you continue through the forest
your head starts to spin
and the forest deteriorates
and starts to decay.
And the world spins
as your head spins,
but in opposite ways.
And you can't tell left from right from wrong,
although you knew it all along.
And everything starts to slow down
and stops
But your mind keeps on spinning
and starts going insane.
Try to get back on track
but can't find the right plane
try to get yourself home
but just missed the last train.
Tried to find a cure
but took the wrong kind of tonic,
so your head keeps on spinning
and you fall to your knees and vomit.
Then you turn and lay on your back and then stare
straight at the ceiling, then run your fingers through her hair
as you walk through your mind
in despair and despondent.
You make your mark
and just keep right on it.
But your head won't
stop spinning
and you stand on your knees,
hands raised towards the sky
to find an escape,
but you just can't die.
Oh, no...
that would be the easy way out.
Then,
just as all hope fades
and you're about to give up.
you see a green vine appear
and you grab it and pull
and up you go
up towards an escape,
an exit you found
in the midst of this maze.
And you see a light
and you keep climbing up
and poke your head out of the sand
and you see her face as she says...
"I'm not sorry,
I regret nothing,
but this won't happen again."
when you've taken away
all the options, now gone,
quiet and frail you lay.
Rest your head on your bed
dig your feet in the sand.
Then stand up and sink in
right where you stand.
Spiraling downwards,
your mind starts to turn.
Your stomach, it squirms.
Single cell resuscitated
while you're still feeling nauseated
Split and split
keep splitting
die.
Live and live
keep living
multiply.
Keep keeping time
just keep right on it.
Fall to your knees while your head spins
and vomit.
And take in her perfume
through your nostrils again
in your mind as you kneel and stomach distends
and compresses
and releases last night's mistake.
You both tried so hard to sleep
but kept each other awake.
And you fumbled around
as you tried to connect
but your love's been outwitted
by mixed drinks and sex
and your clothes are misplaced and lost in the forest
that you find yourself lost inside
and she calls to you
you smell her scent.
She beckons you...
you reply to what's been sent to you.
And you continue to follow her sweet voice
as you continue through the forest
your head starts to spin
and the forest deteriorates
and starts to decay.
And the world spins
as your head spins,
but in opposite ways.
And you can't tell left from right from wrong,
although you knew it all along.
And everything starts to slow down
and stops
But your mind keeps on spinning
and starts going insane.
Try to get back on track
but can't find the right plane
try to get yourself home
but just missed the last train.
Tried to find a cure
but took the wrong kind of tonic,
so your head keeps on spinning
and you fall to your knees and vomit.
Then you turn and lay on your back and then stare
straight at the ceiling, then run your fingers through her hair
as you walk through your mind
in despair and despondent.
You make your mark
and just keep right on it.
But your head won't
stop spinning
and you stand on your knees,
hands raised towards the sky
to find an escape,
but you just can't die.
Oh, no...
that would be the easy way out.
Then,
just as all hope fades
and you're about to give up.
you see a green vine appear
and you grab it and pull
and up you go
up towards an escape,
an exit you found
in the midst of this maze.
And you see a light
and you keep climbing up
and poke your head out of the sand
and you see her face as she says...
"I'm not sorry,
I regret nothing,
but this won't happen again."
A Request
How could you?
___How could I?
_________How could we?
___________How come?
You pound on the bed
__________and you sleep on your drum.
_____and you fake it...
_____You fake it!
_____You Fake It!
_____YOU FAKE IT!
________and you're so persistent,
__________________but we'll never take it.
I used to be honest,
________now I just don't tell lies
and now it makes sense
______that walls stick onto flies.
___With hands out of pockets
________you touch all you see
______________and it turns into dust
___________________and goes into my lungs
_and I hack and I cough
___but it just doesn't stop.
______You turn the lights off
__________and I turn them back on.
____You try to burst my bubble
________but it just won't pop
Please don't continue
___________I'll say it one more time...
STOP!
___How could I?
_________How could we?
___________How come?
You pound on the bed
__________and you sleep on your drum.
_____and you fake it...
_____You fake it!
_____You Fake It!
_____YOU FAKE IT!
________and you're so persistent,
__________________but we'll never take it.
I used to be honest,
________now I just don't tell lies
and now it makes sense
______that walls stick onto flies.
___With hands out of pockets
________you touch all you see
______________and it turns into dust
___________________and goes into my lungs
_and I hack and I cough
___but it just doesn't stop.
______You turn the lights off
__________and I turn them back on.
____You try to burst my bubble
________but it just won't pop
Please don't continue
___________I'll say it one more time...
STOP!
Monday, November 10, 2008
A Reality
A distorted vision of a reality
that does not exist
within the mind of a man who
does not believe
but persists
to falsify his truths
with the allegations of a foreign culture's
inauthenticity
The legality of which
is half that the price
of an arm and a leg.
A penny for your thoughts,
A dime for your time.
Well, a dollar for my thoughts
with inflation on the rise.
Dismissed and forgot
excused from the table
while the accusations fly back and forth
like proverbial mashed potatoes
and let the gravy pour like lies (are you hungry yet?)
onto the floor until you lie there
with no care.
There's no more hair
left on your head,
You've ripped it out,
from all the stress.
You try too hard,
strive to impress.
When all is done,
lay there, undressed,
frail and naked
You tried your best
but to no avail
you failed your test
and only yours
not for the rest
fact of the matter is
you live
with
A distorted vision of a reality
that does not exist
with contemplation
blades at your wrists
two deep breaths
one deep thought
and onto the floor
you let them drop
and scream
"THIS IS IT!"
it is life
it is what you live
and what you live
is accompanied by
A distorted vision of a reality that
does not exist
you took too long
I forged your kiss
onto my lips
both false and fake
one untrue,
the other, mistake.
your hands so cold in fingers' grasp
your face so numb in plastic mask
I wish to touch your hardened lips
and feel only a
moist, warm
kiss.
But of course this cannot happen
with skin made of stone,
why can't you be clay?
At least then you'd be softer
and I could mold you
then hold you
and then I could lie
and say you'll always be there
and I'll never die
but my perception has
blinded me
and now
I live
with
A distorted vision of a reality that
does not exist.
that does not exist
within the mind of a man who
does not believe
but persists
to falsify his truths
with the allegations of a foreign culture's
inauthenticity
The legality of which
is half that the price
of an arm and a leg.
A penny for your thoughts,
A dime for your time.
Well, a dollar for my thoughts
with inflation on the rise.
Dismissed and forgot
excused from the table
while the accusations fly back and forth
like proverbial mashed potatoes
and let the gravy pour like lies (are you hungry yet?)
onto the floor until you lie there
with no care.
There's no more hair
left on your head,
You've ripped it out,
from all the stress.
You try too hard,
strive to impress.
When all is done,
lay there, undressed,
frail and naked
You tried your best
but to no avail
you failed your test
and only yours
not for the rest
fact of the matter is
you live
with
A distorted vision of a reality
that does not exist
with contemplation
blades at your wrists
two deep breaths
one deep thought
and onto the floor
you let them drop
and scream
"THIS IS IT!"
it is life
it is what you live
and what you live
is accompanied by
A distorted vision of a reality that
does not exist
you took too long
I forged your kiss
onto my lips
both false and fake
one untrue,
the other, mistake.
your hands so cold in fingers' grasp
your face so numb in plastic mask
I wish to touch your hardened lips
and feel only a
moist, warm
kiss.
But of course this cannot happen
with skin made of stone,
why can't you be clay?
At least then you'd be softer
and I could mold you
then hold you
and then I could lie
and say you'll always be there
and I'll never die
but my perception has
blinded me
and now
I live
with
A distorted vision of a reality that
does not exist.
A Letter
Dear Tomorrow,
I write to you on behalf of Yesterday and myself. Yesterday left for today what she could not fulfill herself, and thus, I am stuck with unfinished tasks and a list of errands to run that ultimately led to the composition of this letter. I feel that I cannot complete the tasks that have been left for me in my time, so I ask of you to finish what needs to be completed, if this is at all possible. Now, I do not expect you to just know exactly what to do by just a list of things to do, so I shall leave instructions with the list on how to perform and complete each task properly. When you look at the list, there will be many things crossed off of the list. Those items that are crossed off have been fulfilled by either Yesterday or myself. As for all else that is yet to be crossed off, that is what I leave to you.
I do sincerely apologize for the short notice and the lack of commitment that seems to come from Yesterday and I, but with only twenty-four hours each, there is not nearly enough time to complete the task. Along with having to keep track of the day, especially with the recent switch of hours, I have been slightly off and have felt slightly odd. It seems like I'm ever changing and always have to adjust to something new, but alas, I believe I will manage.
Anyway, I would like to thank you sincerely for all the help you provide us Tomorrow. Without you, I am quite unsure how things would ever progress. Should you cease to exist, then as would I and Yesterday would fall victim to the same fate. I have left the list enclosed with this letter and hope that it could be completed by your end.
Thank you sincerely,
Today
I write to you on behalf of Yesterday and myself. Yesterday left for today what she could not fulfill herself, and thus, I am stuck with unfinished tasks and a list of errands to run that ultimately led to the composition of this letter. I feel that I cannot complete the tasks that have been left for me in my time, so I ask of you to finish what needs to be completed, if this is at all possible. Now, I do not expect you to just know exactly what to do by just a list of things to do, so I shall leave instructions with the list on how to perform and complete each task properly. When you look at the list, there will be many things crossed off of the list. Those items that are crossed off have been fulfilled by either Yesterday or myself. As for all else that is yet to be crossed off, that is what I leave to you.
I do sincerely apologize for the short notice and the lack of commitment that seems to come from Yesterday and I, but with only twenty-four hours each, there is not nearly enough time to complete the task. Along with having to keep track of the day, especially with the recent switch of hours, I have been slightly off and have felt slightly odd. It seems like I'm ever changing and always have to adjust to something new, but alas, I believe I will manage.
Anyway, I would like to thank you sincerely for all the help you provide us Tomorrow. Without you, I am quite unsure how things would ever progress. Should you cease to exist, then as would I and Yesterday would fall victim to the same fate. I have left the list enclosed with this letter and hope that it could be completed by your end.
Thank you sincerely,
Today
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
